Upgrade Complete: Now Nobody's in Control

Ah yes, the glorious future is finally here—where even Victorian horse-drawn carriages have gone fully autonomous, and society has collectively decided that “drivers” were always kind of overrated anyway.  Behold the confused, overworked horse—let’s call him Gerald—who’s just trying to do his job, pulling a 19th-century Uber through cobblestone chaos, when suddenly… there’s no coachman. No commands. No “giddy-up.” Just dead silence and a hovering drone with a smug attitude and a Prime logo. Hovering above Gerald is a sleek, self-important delivery drone, probably named “Skylar,” who’s proudly descending to claim the throne—that is, the vacant driver’s bench of this outdated Earth-bound relic. It comes bearing a precious cargo: someone’s organic beard balm and Bluetooth-enabled tea kettle. Vital stuff.

Gerald turns his head, eyes wide, nostrils flared, with the unmistakable expression of “What in Queen Victoria’s corset is this nonsense?”  And rightly so.  Welcome to the steampunk singularity, where technology has advanced far enough to replace everyone… except the guy doing the actual pulling. Gerald still has to work. Gerald didn’t get an upgrade. Gerald didn’t get the memo.  Meanwhile, the drone’s advanced AI has determined it can “pilot” the carriage by landing on the seat and… doing nothing. Because, of course, that’s how artificial intelligence works: impressively ineffective with maximum confidence.  This shirt isn’t just fashion—it’s a prophetic warning. A wearable parable. A cotton-blend sermon on what happens when we chase convenience so hard, we leave common sense in the dust.

Product features
- Available in sizes S to 4XL for the perfect fit.
- Crafted with durable double-needle stitching for lasting quality.
- Designed without side seams for enhanced comfort and style.
- Made from garment-dyed, high-quality US cotton for a soft texture.
- Pre-shrunk fabric ensures consistent sizing after washes.

Care instructions
- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Do not bleach
- Tumble dry: low heat
- Iron, steam or dry: low heat
- Do not dryclean